
MMMmmnnn...good birthday this year and
I'll tell you why. BECAUSE it wasn't defined
by some contrived celebration with some
fluffy cake. It wasn't defined by what I got or
what others did for me (although that was nice).
I defined it. Me. It wasn't just a momentary
pause in all the normal days of the calendar year
or an evening to go out
to dinner and have an excuse to eat dessert.
It was more of an internal event,
a day to stop and think... deep.
Ah, thoughts...
38...I'm liking it. I have the TREMENDOUS
blessing of liking myself, more, the older I get.
I can't explain why. I'm not sure I know.
BUT, 38 is feeling like it fits well. I'm more comfortable
in my own skin than I've been in a while and that's
a peaceful place to be. The house is a mess and
the laundry is always behind but that's not driving me
completely crazy like it normally would...there's
some kind of weird balance that I've found between
the great workouts we've been getting and the
regular bible-study I've been blessed with.
The boys are bright and healthy and growing.
Matt has steady work.
We've got a solid roof over our heads and
food in the pantry and each other.
We love our church, family and friends.
The dog...THE DOG...keeps us
real by dragging in mud and leaves and other things that
I'm not likely to admit.
HUGE TANGENT ALERT!
(I was telling a friend just today that I thought
it was REALLY important to be real and let others
SEE it. SO MANY people with facades putting
out whatever they think is safe or pretty or good
for others to see instead of what life REALLY
looks like for them. SO few who realize that
part of the beauty of life is the struggle...
the overcoming and becoming better.
Hmmnnn...how do we be more authentic, more genuine?)
There's good books...
ooohhh...and new birthday books as well as
boxing gloves for the gym since we're starting
to utilize the bags more. Forgive my...gee, I dunno...
aggressive streak, but beating whatever stress I've
got out on some bags, is awesome.
Anyways..life is full and GOOD and
God is with us and we can do his work and love
him and each other. And lately, I'm enjoying my
confidence in the fact that this place is but a stop
on our way home and all the stuff that I get so crazy about
so often will indeed dissolve and fade away
but God, His Word, and how we love others...THAT remains.
A really intelligent, Spirit-filled lady shared something so
true the other day...she said, "Only a few things are
forever, Holy God, His Word and His People...nothing
else really matters." Kinda clears up what to invest
your time in, huh?
Anyway...38...THIRTY-EIGHT...feels blessed.
I'm trying to invest in what really matters...
taking care of His "temple" so I can do His work,
staying in His Word so I can hear when He tells me what
work He'd have me do, and making intimate connections with
His People so that we can share and worship Him together,
starting with my husband our boys and our folks...from there
we just gotta work to shine that light out...
Whew...well, there you go...there's my big,
birthday, brain-dump and what's been rolling around
in my old, aged brain lately... :)
I'm entitled, on my birthday, to have one extended rambling, right?
Yeah, I sure am. Thanks for putting up with me.
I'll put my soap box back in the corner now under
the potato basket where it belongs...
HEY...happy birthday to you this year whenever
it is and I hope you like yours as much as I liked mine.
I'll tell you why. BECAUSE it wasn't defined
by some contrived celebration with some
fluffy cake. It wasn't defined by what I got or
what others did for me (although that was nice).
I defined it. Me. It wasn't just a momentary
pause in all the normal days of the calendar year
or an evening to go out
to dinner and have an excuse to eat dessert.
It was more of an internal event,
a day to stop and think... deep.
Ah, thoughts...
38...I'm liking it. I have the TREMENDOUS
blessing of liking myself, more, the older I get.
I can't explain why. I'm not sure I know.
BUT, 38 is feeling like it fits well. I'm more comfortable
in my own skin than I've been in a while and that's
a peaceful place to be. The house is a mess and
the laundry is always behind but that's not driving me
completely crazy like it normally would...there's
some kind of weird balance that I've found between
the great workouts we've been getting and the
regular bible-study I've been blessed with.
The boys are bright and healthy and growing.
Matt has steady work.
We've got a solid roof over our heads and
food in the pantry and each other.
We love our church, family and friends.
The dog...THE DOG...keeps us
real by dragging in mud and leaves and other things that
I'm not likely to admit.
HUGE TANGENT ALERT!
(I was telling a friend just today that I thought
it was REALLY important to be real and let others
SEE it. SO MANY people with facades putting
out whatever they think is safe or pretty or good
for others to see instead of what life REALLY
looks like for them. SO few who realize that
part of the beauty of life is the struggle...
the overcoming and becoming better.
Hmmnnn...how do we be more authentic, more genuine?)
There's good books...
ooohhh...and new birthday books as well as
boxing gloves for the gym since we're starting
to utilize the bags more. Forgive my...gee, I dunno...
aggressive streak, but beating whatever stress I've
got out on some bags, is awesome.
Anyways..life is full and GOOD and
God is with us and we can do his work and love
him and each other. And lately, I'm enjoying my
confidence in the fact that this place is but a stop
on our way home and all the stuff that I get so crazy about
so often will indeed dissolve and fade away
but God, His Word, and how we love others...THAT remains.
A really intelligent, Spirit-filled lady shared something so
true the other day...she said, "Only a few things are
forever, Holy God, His Word and His People...nothing
else really matters." Kinda clears up what to invest
your time in, huh?
Anyway...38...THIRTY-EIGHT...feels blessed.
I'm trying to invest in what really matters...
taking care of His "temple" so I can do His work,
staying in His Word so I can hear when He tells me what
work He'd have me do, and making intimate connections with
His People so that we can share and worship Him together,
starting with my husband our boys and our folks...from there
we just gotta work to shine that light out...
Whew...well, there you go...there's my big,
birthday, brain-dump and what's been rolling around
in my old, aged brain lately... :)
I'm entitled, on my birthday, to have one extended rambling, right?
Yeah, I sure am. Thanks for putting up with me.
I'll put my soap box back in the corner now under
the potato basket where it belongs...
HEY...happy birthday to you this year whenever
it is and I hope you like yours as much as I liked mine.


2 comments:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!
Sorry I missed it. I feel so priviledged to call you friend. I hope our lives continue to cross..and a bit more frequently too. Thanks for sharing yourself. I love you,
Bethany
P.S. If Matt will promise not to kill him, I'll tell you Doug said 'I love you, peanut.' Let me know if I need to give Doug a heads up before Sunday.
Oh, I am so happy I read this post tonight.Ihave actually been on the phone talking to my fam.about how I want to celebrate my, ahem, fortieth...and this was a great post. thanks!
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