"Not Me Monday"

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by
MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what
she and everyone else have not been doing this week.


The untold dangers of driving with your cell phone
and NOT TALKING on it...LABEL ME EXPLICIT!
THIS is your last warning.

This will be short...I will only share this only one time.
I will not respond to ANY questions...

IT WAS NOT ME who had her phone on vibrate
because she had been in a meeting. IT WAS NOT ME who made
a quick call while pulling out of the parking lot to check on kids.
It WAS ME who got off the cell-phone, IN THE CAR,
quickly, because she was driving. IT WAS NOT ME who
thought the best place for the phone was between my
knees so I could quickly free my hands. IT WAS NOT ME
who briefly forgot about where I had stored my cell phone
set to VIBRATE as I drove home. IT WAS NOT ME
who had to brake several times on the way home
each time scooting the cell-phone a little further
back from its starting location between my knees to its
final resting place between my...ahem..thighs. IT WAS NOT ME
who got quite a...uh, well...JAZZY little
shock a few minutes later...when (THANK GOD) it was her
husband who called and set sneaky cell-phone to
buzzing in a sensitive location. (Can you imagine if it had
been, oh, I dunno, the principal or the pastor or
something! I'd have died!) IT WAS NOT ME who nearly peed her
pants laughing (do you suppose that would have shorted the
phone? Would the warranty cover that you think?)
all the rest of the way home.

I mean, personally, between you and me...a kiss from my husband
and I'm all tingly but this was just a little
different. Matt, baby, you're so good!

I DID NOT post this. I WILL LIE and DENY
if you try to speak to me in person about this post.
My cell phone and I ARE NOT that close. It's over.
IT NEVER HAPPENED.



Hey, Matt? Honey, can you call me?